Ah, December and its holidays are upon us!
This full moon is known as the Cold Moon or Long Nights Moon. It’s a time of completion at year’s end.
I also found this little piece on it, which characterizes Long Nights Moon this way (bolded portions I found particularly applicable to my life this month):
“As the days get shorter and Yule approaches with the longest night of the year, we force ourselves to get through the darkness because eventually we will see the sunlight and warmth again. Think about the things in your life that you’ve had to endure. Sometimes, a part of us must die in order to be reborn. Now is the perfect time for spiritual alchemy — time to evaluate your life, and know that you’ll survive the dark times.
“If you’ve already put the darkness behind you, take your good fortune and share it with others. When it’s cold outside, open your heart and home to friends and family. Reach out to people who might be suffering from the chill of winter, either spiritually or physically.”
As this year ends, my first post-university full-time job is set to end. This is something I have been looking forward to as it would be a clean break and allow for me to move on, but, the past few days, as reality has sunk in and I’ve realized it’s almost here, I found myself caught in the chokehold of fear for my future. Just last month, I thought it would go on until spring, and had made peace with that, only to have a curve ball thrown at me last week. I have no concrete plans now, other than to ride the ship down this month, and go from there. As you can imagine, there is a substantial part of my mind that doesn’t like not having contingency plans. This identity I’ve had for three years, “legal secretary,” will soon die…It won’t be mine anymore, and I’ll have to decide who and what I am without that label dominating my psyche.
Yesterday was particularly rough, one of those fabled “dark nights of the soul” where every self-doubt and every insecurity came out to play and take over my thoughts, coupled with a wave of fear. Today, though, I was able to shake it all off somewhat. Oh, it is still lurking behind me, breathing down my neck, but I’m not listening to it, and it’s not choking me. This is a powerful day, the first of two full moons this month, with the rebirth of the Light on the way, and, as the piece above said, time for spiritual alchemy, evaluating life, and knowing I’ll survive the dark times if or when they come.
For the first time, I went about making my dream board entirely intuitively. I didn’t have any pre-planned theme, no pre-made wishes to incorporate in it. I just sat down in the floor this evening with magazines and catalogs and cut out what appealed to me.
You know what I see?
I see peace, joy, transformation (“om namah shivaya”–in the upper right corner–is supposed to be a transformative mantra), and treats (cookies, cappuccino, and a pedicure!). I see light in the darkness, and beauty in the sparseness of winter. I see celebrating the Solstice, and a rising of literal and figurative Light.
Let it be. Please, let it be.