Wishcasting Wednesday: Leap

Once again, Jamie Ridler posted an eerily synchronous prompt for this week’s Wishcasting Wednesday.  She asked:

What leap do you wish to take?

To establish how timely this is,  I give you pages from my art journal that I created yesterday.  Behold, a woman readying herself for a leap:

Yesterday's art journal pages.

Yesterday's art journal pages.

See also this post from last week and this post from yesterday.

I wish to take the leap of faith that I’ve been afraid of, the leap out of the current circumstances in my life that are not working–my job, living with my parents in this teeny, tiny town–and into the life that haunts my dreams and daydreams.

I wish to leap out of my current job, as keeping it is not good for me, physically, emotionally, or spiritually.  I thought I could stick it out, but in the past few weeks, it has become abundantly clear that I can’t…Maybe for a little while, but not indefinitely.  It may be fine for others.  It is just not working for me, not at all.

As for living with my parents, and the town in which we live, first and foremost I don’t fit in.  I don’t know how to relate to people here.  I grew up here, yes, but I’ve never fit in.  I’m the one constantly accused of having her head in the clouds, because I dare dream beyond the limitations of this particular town and its customs and economy.  I’ve been continually heckled because I was more interested in academia than the usual tween and teenage pursuits, because I can’t seem to “dumb myself down,” and because people think I am “uppity” simply because I honestly don’t know what to say to them since I have interests wildly divergent from theirs.  I am not and cannot force myself to be a conservative, evangelical Christian, which is the dominant religious/spiritual orientation here, and this is especially true of my family.  I don’t want to hurry up and get married, not that I have sparked with anyone here.  (I haven’t.)  The job I have, or others like it at different firms, is the best I can hope to do, as far as employment goes here, given the degree I have, a Bachelor of Arts in English Literature (without a Secondary Education degree).  Plus, I feel I often have to hide parts of myself, as I am too open to many different spiritual paths and ways of being for my family’s liking (or the culture’s, for that matter).  I love how Mama Nature shows up here, and how things are close by and there’s less traffic, but that’s about it for the things I really like.  They don’t balance out the things that rankle, nor most of my life spent knowing that I don’t belong here.

I have a financial cushion now, a nice one.  I’ve done relevant research (as much as I can do without going there).  I’ve just not yet amassed the courage to take the leap.  I have been afraid of leaping jobless into this economy.  I’ve been afraid of familial censure, because the place that calls to me is across the country, and they don’t even want me to leave this region of the state.    But I can’t stay where I am.  Down deep in my bones I know I can’t maintain the status quo if I ever want to reach my potential, if I ever want to be truly happy.  At the very least, I have to go see what’s out there.  If I fail, if I end up in a situation that forces me to come back here, at least I will know I tried.

Those are the leaps I wish to take, all leaps of faith, leaps of faith in myself and an abundant, providential Universe.

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Categories: Wishcasting Wednesdays | Tags: , , | 9 Comments

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9 thoughts on “Wishcasting Wednesday: Leap

  1. I say this in all honesty, dear Rebekah…

    Please consider taking a leap to Dayton for a visit 🙂 (Or perhaps we could meet somewhere in between.)

    We would have SUCH fun! And I will gladly hold space for your leaping dreams as you share and we commiserate.

    I see you. I honor you.

    You are more courageous than you know.

    The net will appear. Trust me.

    🙂

  2. May you take that leap of faith. As you wish for yourself, so I wish for you also.

  3. When I opened up this post, I was immediately struck by the beauty and power and energy of your journal page. And then I read the Sue Monk Kidd quote and was nodding my head excitedly “yes!” And then reading your words … oh yes, you are so ready to leap and it is scary but underneath that is the stepping into your power, your truth, your Life which is exciting and powerful! The shedding of the old which doesn’t fit, but still can be painful to let go of the familiar …

    It is easy for me to say “Go!” and I know the fear of going jobless in this economy but it seems whatever obstacles you may encounter will be worth the freedom and opportunity to step into the life you envision for yourself.

    As Rebekah wishes for herself, so I wish for her also. With my whole ♥ May you leap into the life you were born to live!

  4. As Rebekah wishes for herself, I’m wishing too.

    You’ve made the decision in your heart – when the time is right you will leap!

    BTW Thanks for commenting on my post.

  5. As Rebekah wishes for herself, so I wish for her also. It takes courage, but I have spent years regretting that I did not leap when I had the chance. I have found a place here and am happy but I have a difficult time letting go and not looking over my shoulder and wondering.

  6. As Rebekah wishes for herself, so I wish for her as well. Don’t be afraid of taking the leap out of your job and into one that is of passion. Remember the Universe will always provide for you.

  7. As Rebekah wishes for herself, so I wish for her also!
    It sounds like you are so ready to leap.

  8. As Rebekah wishes for herself, I wish for her also.

    You have made the first huge leap – deciding you must leave. You will know when you are ready for the final leap. It will be on your own terms and in your own time.
    May your leap of faith take you to a wonderful place where your dreams will be fulfilled.

  9. As Rebekah wishes for herself, so I wish for her also.

    You can do it! Remember your personal power and stand right smack in the middle of it!

    Bright Blessings,

    Tren

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